I fully recognize that kids these days are very different than the kids that were around when i was a little curler growing up. we had black/white gameboy with 20 games, all 2D. these kids have fully color enhanced 24 hour battery Gcubex267239 and take them to baseball games because the cartoon Smoltz is more real than the real Smoltz. we had little dinky scooters that went 10 mph max and the wheels got stuck in any mud. kids these days have those badass razor scooters. no one got a blowjob in middle school unless they were dating kristin donut; i mean we were passing notes and being idiots about girls. blowjobs in 6th grade are a dime a dozen nowadays, not to mention text messaging from your sidekick 2 about whose bar mitzvah you wanna hit up this weekend. point being, kids these days are just completely different than we were.
Parenting seems to be pretty standard. I mean there arent vast changes to the way parents are thinking... however you were raised, youre probably going to either be extremely similar or completely opposite if you thought your parents sucked balls. so for example when i become a dad, things like dont point at other people, chew with your mouth closed, look both ways before crossing the street, are just pretty simple lessons that must be drilled inside the kids heads.
so here is what i am wondering... when did a group of parents decide to get together, hijack an idea from the 'discipline' section of the pet store, and put velcro on it for their human children?
Oh come on kid... it cant be THAT fun
I would of course be talking about the child leash. or child harness, as it is more commonly referred to, in order to make it sound nicer and sweeter, with more love, than a leash for your kid. now i know its easy to bash the parents who use the leashes. saying things like: dont you love your child? dont you feel like your child should be able to explore? dont you think the child sees other parents giving you guilty looks? do you run your house like a zoo?
here we see a leash child 'incognito' so his mom wont feel guilty
and of course all these questions are reasonable, considering that you are an ADULT and he is a CHILD and you are supposed to be helping him learn when its ok to run around and when he needs to stay close by. or maybe 'hold my hand while we cross the street, make sure to look both ways'. or maybe 'stay with mommy'. i mean there are probably a million solutions to not resorting to a fucking leash for your child.
even this hippie has issues. 'the damn kid wont mellow out for 5 minutes!'
here is what one momma says: "If you dont want them to run off, teach them not to run off."
here is what another momma says: "...the leash conveys an innapropriate message by using physical force instead of words to keep your child near you"
here is what momma 3 said to those 2 bitches: "listen bitches, i am a neurotic scared to death of anything remotely bad happening to my baby kind of momma. what if he gets a booboo? then i have to deal with the crying!"
and to all 3 of these mommas here is what i say: wrap it up.... wrap it up.
so anyway, i guess i can step off the soapbox until tomorrow. if for some reason you were a leash child, i guess that means you had some behavior issues or poor parent role models, who knows. if you are thinking about leashing your children, you should definitely not fucking do it. i would hate to see pictures in a scrapbook/on the internet one day of me as a child in a leash. and finally, if a kid is out of control and dumb enough to run off into the street or around the mall with no regard for his parents whereabouts... well, my man Darwin already thought that one out.
apologies to my 420 brethren for yesterdays debacle. if i had known it was $9 for your first beer and $4 for each one thereafter, i would never have promoted the event. sweetwater is usually flowing like water for free, i guess this was a charity event. the swarm of cops naturally didnt help. can anyone PLEASE confirm that piedmont park thing? i want to smoke trees there. thank you and have a wonderful day.