Friday, March 25, 2005

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Nut Trees and that Green Shit Everywhere

Alright you little complaining bitches.... the conversation with a black chick has been taken down. god damn its too politically correct out there, even in bloggyland. the reason i put that up in the first place is because i was walking down the hall at work and as i passed one of those 8' x 8' cube spaces, i heard this white chick going on and on about the dumbest shit while the black chick was just like 'uh huh, ok, yaaaaaa'. she probably goes home to her lady friends and bitches about the white woman who bitches about the dumbest shit at work.

that said, i think its safe to say its springtime in ATL. with spring comes the dark tan, one of the things my jewish jersey smoker mom blessed me with in her gene pool. also, the skirts are being rocked like crazy right now... keep up the good work ladies. just try not to mix two fashion faux paus together.... like capri pants with a skirt over it, or jean skirt with chinchila jacket and uggs. keep it simple, and sexy, and short. hahaha. also with the spring comes my annual hurr dye festivities, where my little brown ix become my frosty tip ix, circa gavin rossdale 1996. (thanks dembo!)

and last but not least, the trees. now im not talking about the kind of trees that i will be burning around 4ish this afternoon until sunday night. these trees are special to atlanta. basically every year around late march, early april, these trees blossom and emit the most horrific odor known to man. they can be found all over the emory/clifton road area, as well as in the VA highlands and midtown. who knows where they have spread by now.... i guess i refer to them as nut trees, although i have heard the varieties: cum trees, pussy trees, vemunda trees, chode trees.

does anyone know the actual name of the trees that smell like absolute ass in atlanta? you cant walk down the street without deeply inhaling the fresh scent of semen in the morning. its refreshing to know that there is a worse smell out there than deep fried tuna hairpie.

and the only thing worse than a big wiff of semen in your nose? green pollen EVERYWHERE! i dont think i have ever been to a state with worse pollen count during spring/summer.

when i say it leaves green residue on everything, i am not fucking around. cars, sidewalks, bums, everything. and this is why i wrote my college essay on hating nature.

have fun this weekend. GOOOOOO CARDS!


At 3/25/2005 1:20 PM, Blogger cantseefade said...

Bowing down to political correctness? I expected more from you shoobie. Alot of jews have big noses, alot of white people walk like they have a stick up their ass and alot of black people speak in ebonics. Stereotypes are almost always grounded with some basis in fact. Put your post back up and stick in to the man. Fight the power!!

At 3/25/2005 1:51 PM, Blogger Paulie said...

I believe your cum trees are bradford pear trees. These trees not only smell like ass, they are real good at falling over during ice storms.


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