Monday, May 23, 2005

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1 Year Review + Dank Flicks

So i began this bloggy venture on 6/2/2004. One year to the date from when i began my venture here at the .gov As my 2 years in the real world and 1 year in the blogosphere come to a hedge, i am completely lost for words. it is fucking hard as shit to come up with new adolescent humor on a daily basis. i was thinking about retiring and heading to australia and parts of india to smoke copious amounts of mj. problem there is its already been done by a not-so-retired ricky williams. another possibility would be to just jump the shark.... happy days will reign once again. then i thought hell, what if i scheme and coerce one of these garbage/janitor dudes at work to drop a dumpster on my head. severance like a mufucka. but that would fuck up my incredibly gifted mind, developed at THE magnet school.

so what can i do to celebrate my 1 year blog anniversary? ideas can be submitted in obnoxious format to the comments section.

in the meantime i will revert to my uncreative, uninspired, and unoriginal bread and butter: movie reviews.

Star Wars III: Revenge of the Sith
As we all know i posted a blog entitled 'top 10 reasons star wars sucks'. this was specifically to see how much traffic i could generate by googlers typing in that phrase and subsequently hitting up my blog. before the release of the movie, traffic increased almost 200%. the movie was pretty good... definitely better than I and II, mainly due to less jarjar, less convo on the whole, and way more action and graphics battles than before. it does a very good job of darkening the plot and showing anakins sinking towards the dark side. heres what it should have changed:
- more skin shown by natalie portman
- less cheese drama lines by natalie portman
- more wookie!
- a more realistic attack on the jedis. was the force out of order that day?
all in all a fantastic movie. i wanted to have tons of pictures of the freaks but of course north dekalb mall doesnt exactly attract that kind of crowd. i heard regal was out of control.

Kingdom of Heaven
This movie was exactly what it was billed to be. lame action flick with lots of sweat blood and tears. orlando bloom is the new russell crowe? not quite. he barely pulls off this role as a bastard blacksmith whose father rolls into town to have him join the crusades. then they arrive in jerusalem and fight arabs and christians for the holy city. of course nothing is resolved, very similar to current conditions. netflixable, but not worth 8 bucks a pop.

Kicking and Screaming
Well i was really really hi for this movie. so in general i thought this movie was pretty damn funny. i mean you have to understand its a will ferrel movie with a pg rating and a kiddie theme. i mean he cant even say fuck shit bitch anything like that... so dont bring your earmuffs to the show; your virgin ears will be ok. if you like ferrel then youll like this flick. if you think sarcasm and slapstick is lame, then you are lame and shouldnt see this movie. last 20 minutes may as well have been cut due to fluff cheese closing ending.

Kung Fu Hustle
i havent actually seen this movie but i just wanna say i love asians. they have the best noodles.
Braves Game is 2 for 1 tix tonight. we dropped to 2nd in the NL Eastside as Baahstan handed us a wicked series to close our road trip 4-8. thanks for the txt bomb mander.
24 is a 2 hour special tonight on fox slanted news.
what happened to a new FG last night?
desperate housewives ended ever so lamely last night. questionable tivo waste for 2nd season.
memorial day is up and coming. peers rejoice as this holiday is not just celebrated by federal employees.
timmy-jimmy and dwelly combined to form the newest sneak attack apartment for my summer post briarcliff pool skancing.
god i miss dancing around the maypole with ms harkelroad.


At 5/23/2005 3:02 PM, Blogger cmdrslappy said...

holy crap! harkleroad and the maypole! holy crap!

did you get my text message the other night?

sorry i can't chat much as of late... the business, it is booming!



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