Worst. Sports Announcer. Ever.

Can anyone on Earth argue against the fact that the worst sports announcer ever is Bryant Gumbel?


i just found this link while surfing
Its bad enough that the NFL Network is barely picked up in any states. They choose of all people Bryant Gumbel & insert sucker who sold his sportscaster soul here to call their HUGE important Thursday night games. By huge and important i mean these:
Thursday, Nov. 23-Chiefs 19, Broncos 10 (billed to be a big kickoff for the AFC West. Now these teams are barely clinging to playoff hopes. i dont think either will get in)
Thursday, Nov. 30-Bengals 13, Ravens 7 (nice score. this was a defensive battle royal. these 2 were a good call)
Thursday, Dec. 7-Steelers 27, Browns 7 (usually a huge local rivalry, these teams were already dead in december)
Thursday, Dec. 14-49ers 24, Seahawks 14 (a huge win for SF that means nothing because they are mid grade. everyone hates the seahawks except people in seattle.)
Saturday, Dec. 16-Cowboys 38, Falcons 28 (ya ya, we lost. but i would rather talk about the sportscasters for this broadcast below...keep reading)
Thursday, Dec. 21 / 8:00 p.m. ET-Vikings vs. Packers
Saturday, Dec. 23 / 8:00 p.m. ET-Chiefs vs. Raiders
Saturday, Dec. 30 / 8:00 p.m. ET-Giants vs. Redskins

anyway back to Bryant Gumball. when i have 25 people over to my place. open bar. beers were flowing. bbq was rolling. everyone was getting crunk. we turn on the HDank TV. Falcons Cowboys. billed to be a huge win for the wildcard. the only good sportscaster for the NFL network (mentioned above), Chris Collinsworth, was MIA from this game. so they pick of all people Dick Vermeil.


if dick could lay off the stogies, people would actually enjoy listening to him call a football game
nothing against Dick (choo knows i hate the Chiefs) but he sounded like he had just smoked a box of macanudos. the game sound is so, so horrible. bryant gumbel's squeaky voice, complete monotone and lack of excitement, only call the exact stat-line and add nothing valuable in terms of stats, facts, good trivia, things you can get an intern to data mine, etc. so at halftime they pulled this mother fucking dick vermeil off the air. and now, the party of drunk fans i.e. Thirsty Mike, were left with crapass bryant scrumballs and neon deion and some other dude to call the 2nd half. at which time the falcons ate it big on saturday night football.

i think the main thing to remember from all of this is: if bryant gumbel could speak without pissing everyone off, that channel might rival the other sportscasters. until they fire my man bryant gumbel and stick him behind the stock market watch channel, or the CPA all day channel, or any other channel where the bulk of listeners dont care if he drones on and on, the NFL Network Thursday night games will continue to lick balls. thank you and have happy holidays and a happy new year.

ps-- christians, i just have to bash one thing a year as a jew on christmas. giant yard snow globes are insane. seriously? why do you buy them. is it the commercials? the one where they went to home depot and couldnt remember its name. giant snow globe. ya thats it. no... its not. its tacky as hell yall. pardon the pun, but i have to burst your bubbles. peace.

I Promise One Day I'll Be Back

but until then, check out my adobe skills. inspired by scarface from half baked. this picture was taken by an ajc photographer AND run on the front page of the AJC. they decided 'the story' was 'the finger', so they rolled with it despite many other media outlets fuzzing it out. me and thirsty mike still have faith, possibly the only ones left. 3 more games, 3 more shots. mike vick gon rock tha dome.

(rollover with mouse to see real pic)